Want to see some funny movie quotes and humorous movie sayings to make you laugh? You know how some movies have moments of laughter that are so funny that you remember for many years to come?
Well, you can find top funny quotes and jokes here to enjoy. Check them out…
“Evil will always triumph over good because good is dumb.”
Dark Helmet, Space Balls
“I know they were just kids…but man we beat the fuck out of them!”
Dogma
“I don’t know what to say, so I’ll just say what’s in my heart… Baboom, Baboom, Baboom.”
Mel Brooks
“Name’s Barf. I’m a Mog, half man half dog. I’m my own best friend.”
Spaceballs
When a naked man is chasing a woman through an alley with a butcher knife and a hard-on, I figure he isn’t out collecting for the Red Cross.
— Clint Eastwood (Dirty Harry, 1971)
Husbands should be like Kleenex: soft, strong, and disposable.
— Madeleine Kahn (from the film Clue – 1985 – Jonathan Lynn, John Landis)
I have strong feelings about gun control. If there’s a gun around, I want to be controlling it.
— Clint Eastwood (from Pink Cadillac, 1989 – John Eskow)
Drama is life with the dull bits left out.
— Alfred Hitchcock
More Funny Movie Quotes
Enjoyed the funny quotes above taken from famous movies and TV shows? Then you are going to enjoy these new funny movie quotes too. Check them out…
Jude Law is in so many movies, that I went to one, and when I walked out they were showing another on the back wall.
— Chris Rock
What do you call 500 lawyers lying on the bottom of the Ocean?
A good start…
— Danny DeVito (The War of the Roses, 1989)
A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.
— Alfred Hitchcock
A film is never really any good unless the camera is an eye in the head of a poet.
— Orson Welles
Our comedies are not to be laughed at.
— Samuel Goldwyn
Once a month the sky falls on my head, I come to, and I see another movie I want to make.
— Steven Spielberg
Addams Family Values
(Gomez refers to the girl popping out of the cake at a bachelor party)
Was she in there before you baked it?
Addams Family Values
Gomez: Children, why do you hate the baby?
Pugsley: We don’t hate him. We just wanna play with him.
Wednesday: Especially his head.
Addams Family Values
Little Girl: …and then Mommy kissed Daddy, and the angel told the stork, and the stork flew down from heaven, and put the diamond in the cabbage patch, and the diamond turned into a baby!
Pugsley: Our parents are having a baby too.
Wednesday: They had sex.
Airplane
There’s no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you’ll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
Animal Crackers
Spaulding: (to two ladies) Let’s get married!
Mrs. Rittenhouse: The three of us? Why, that’s bigamy!
Spaulding: Yes! And it’s big of me, too!
Arthur
I’m so rich, I wish I had a dime for every dime I have.
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
If I’m not back in five minutes… wait longer!
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
Lois: How would you like me to make your life a living hell?
Ace Ventura: Well, I’m not really ready for a relationship, Lois, but thank you for asking. Hey, maybe I’ll give you a call sometime. Your number’s still 911? All righty then.
The Addams Family
Pugsley: We’re not shy!
Wednesday: We’re contagious.
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
As long as people are still having premarital sex with many anonymous partners while at the same time experimenting with mind-expanding drugs in a consequence free environment, I’ll be sound as a pound!
Harry: ‘Yeah I called her up, she gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something, I don’t know, I wasn’t really paying attention.’
Dumb and Dumber
‘There’s no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you’ll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?’
Airplane
‘Name’s Barf. I’m a Mog, half man half dog. I’m my own best friend.’
Spaceballs
Adam/Felicia: ‘Oh for goodness sakes, get down off that crucifix, someone needs the wood!’
The Adventures of Priscilla: Queen of the Desert
‘The key here, I think, is to not think of death as an end. But, but, think of it more as a very effective way of cutting down on your expenses.’
Love and Death
‘Do you prefer fashion victim or ensemblelly challenged?’
Clueless
Col. Mustard: ‘You lure men to their deaths, like a spider with flies!’
Miss White: ‘Flies are where men are most vulnerable.’
Clue
‘You know, you haven’t stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.’
Duck Soup
More Funny Movie Quotes
Enjoyed the funny quotes above taken from famous movies and TV shows? Then you are going to enjoy these new funny movie quotes too. Check them out…
‘I’m not bad, I’m just drawn that way.’
Who Framed Roger Rabbit
Reporter: ‘Tell me, how did you find America? John Lennon: Turned left at Greenland.’
A Hard Day’s Night
Mrs. White: ‘Husbands should be like Kleenex: soft, strong, and disposable.’
Clue
George: ‘It’s amazing the clarity that comes with psychotic jealousy.’
My Best Friend’s Wedding
Forrest Gump: (referring to Apple Computers) ‘He got me invested in some kinda fruit company.’
Forrest Gump
Edgar Friendly: ‘I’m no leader. I do what I have to do…sometimes people come with me.’
Demolition Man
‘I’ve got a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.’
Duck Soup
‘If I’m not back in five minutes… wait longer!’
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
‘Was she in there before you baked it?’ (Gomez refers to the girl popping out of the cake at a bachelor party)
Addams Family Values
Scarecrow (Ray Bolger): ‘I haven’t got a brain… only straw.’
Dorothy (Judy Garland): ‘How can you talk if you haven’t got a brain?’
Scarecrow: ‘I don’t know… But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking… don’t they?’
Dorothy: ‘Yes, I guess you’re right.’
Wizard of Oz
‘It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we’ve got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.’
The Blues Brothers
